Reducing the impact of Morris Dancing on the Planet
Royal Liberty Morris have partnered with the EFDSS in a new green initiative - called "Take The Right Steps" - aimed at shrinking the carbon footprint of the Morris community nationwide and hope that by reducing emissions Morris Sides across the country will be seen to be at the forefront of the now quite obviously futile fight against the earth's imminent destruction and massive loss of life that we're reminded of on a daily by the worlds media, national government and the old skanky one-eyed man down the road who's seen it all before.
In a statement Bovril, bovine Mascot of Royal Liberty stated "We're overjoyed that the EDFSS approached us to partner them in this venture. As a team with a couple of years short of 40 years tradition ourselves, we're happy to do our bit and recycle our old dances rather than waste what precious little natural resources mother earth has left by inventing new ones."
Royal Lib have already taken bullish direct action by re-introducing Swaggering Boney, Nutting Girl and Glorishears to their Thursday night practice sessions at Fairkytes Arts Centre, Hornchurch.
Whilst modest estimates have been poorly considered, over-optimistic wide guesses suggest that something in the region of 500,000 steps could be saved each year by Royal Liberty Morris alone. These figures rise considerably when Cotswold stepping, capers and galleys are thrown into the mix.
It's hoped that by taking the bull by the horns in England's National Dance movement the other home nations will also take up the stick - Irish Dancing being particularly wasteful of steps. It is thought the Welsh, however, will be sceptical and use their dance veto in favour of continuing to sing monotonously and with unnecessary use of volume and valleys. A Welsh spokes-sheep indicated that they have their own plans to reduce the use of both the letters "Y" and "G".
Should this action prove a success it's thought that a very large number with lots of zeros steps could be saved worldwide - Cossacks have had a similar scheme in operation for some time although the data has yet to be verified, collected or recorded.
An interim report is expect in due course.
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